I haven't blogged in a little over a month, and even that was just a haiku. Since the breakup I really haven't done as much writing as I'd like to. Don't get me wrong, I have been writing--but I haven't produced anything whole. Just snippets and phrases that could be woven into larger projects if I had the mental clarity to bring them to that point. I guess this is a good time to put it all together and try to make something of it all.
In the absence of writing, I have been doing a lot of reading, tweeting on Twitter, working out on the bike and with weights, and most importantly actually going out and having fun with people who I consider family, even if they are technically my ex's family. Actually I'd include my ex in that statement. We've been having so much fun lately that it makes me wish we were still together--but I know that I have a lot of serious work to do on myself before I can get into any type of relationship right now. Period. I can't waver from that because I know I'll just fall into my same old patterns. There are two sides to every story and I believe that we both caused the downfall of our relationship--but I do not know what the future holds, or with whom my heart will find its home. So I'm just staying calm in the interim and focusing on me. I think that's the best thing I can do.
I'm feeling very connected to my creative self even if I haven't been indulging her too much. I'm breaking the codependency cycle and learning who the hell I really am, and as I continue to do that I'm sure the words and lyrics will come too. I'm going to try to get back into the flow of things next week with two or three blog updates. So stay tuned for those, and have a wonderful weekend... I appreciate your support more now than ever, if that's possible, and I am just so grateful that you are still here (or if you're new here, that you're here now).