Hey guys! It's been way too long since I updated last, and I apologize for that! I spent some time the other night looking through my old website files, and I was shocked at what I found. There was SO much creativity going on back then. It wasn't even really that long ago, but I feel like a completely different person. It's like I shut down the fun and free side of me and tried to become "professional," and you know what happens when you do that. It's like trying too hard to grow up too soon. You become stagnant, boring, and you end up wishing for your old life back.
Those old blog posts are so full of life. I don't know if you have noticed with these newer ones (excluding this one!)... but even though I am actually sharing more creative work with you (poetry), there is somehow much less life in those than there was in my old rambling "letters," as I called them before the word "blog" became popular. I was a trailblazer back then! Haha, no, I'm not seriously blowing my own horn on that one. But I am glad that you and I forged that blogger/reader connection all the way back in 2001 and that we have continued straight through to today. I'm not excluding the newbies in that statement--you are all family as far as I'm concerned, no matter how long you have been here. I am just grateful for all of you, period. I can't believe you're still here.
Honestly I think I just got so caught up in trying to become independent and self-reliant that I let all the fun slip right out of my life. I've been so focused on self-improvement (whether or not I actually get there) and working hard (even when I'm not getting the job done). I'm a big boring ball of contradictions, devoid of the electric creative spark that I once had. Or at least I have been up until now. I'm deliberately writing this blog right now without censoring or editing myself. Whatever comes out is what comes out. Just like it used to. It's so much better that way.
It's the beginning of 2008 and I want to consciously make this year a great one. Not just great in terms of accomplishments, but in terms of FUN. I have accomplished more financially in the last two years than I have in all of my life. I'm not rich, I'm still in debt (but not much, thank God!), and I'm still trying to figure out how to be completely independent when my soul is happier being a starving artist. But I'll figure all that out. The key here is to figure it out while I have fun... and while I continue to tap into that creative energy that I lost somewhere along the way.
Did you miss me as much as I did? Hope so. I hope you're ready for a brand new website, fresh poetry, and finally at long last some beautiful music! All that is coming your way very soon... Hang in there and spread the word, get your friends to join the mailing list, do what you've got to do... It's going to be a fun year around here and I want so much for you to be a part of it!
As always thanks for sticking with me... 2008 is gonna be one unforgettable year!